A Tryst with the Banana Cake

The idea of mixing banana with flour or any dairy products was beyond me. So for most of my lifetime I dodged savouries which had banana as a key ingredient.

Banana milkshake, banana based bakery items, banana ice cream, banana and milk, banana pan fried in butter were permanently added to the list of food items to be never consumed. The banana based offering to God which are later given to the devotees was also off charts.

Then came along a hungry day which changed my outlook and started the battle between me and the banana cake. 

I was at the airport making a run for the flight with a super hungry tummy. The only possibility of food for next 4 hours was to pick the quickest available option and sprint towards the boarding gate. There were expensive options like fresh salads, nut bars, low sugar fruity yogurts and the not so expensive  packed banana cake. It was a no brainer. When it came down to money, the square shaped banana cake won. 

Inside the flight the wrapper came off and reluctantly I bit into the quadroid with rounded edges. What can I say.. It was like an Aha moment for me, quite a revelation. The lightness of the banana accompanied by a tinge of the walnut bitterness hit my palate. The feel of satisfying my hunger with something so fragrant enveloped me and I let out a big "aaah". The lady sitting on the next seat was taken aback. She looked confused as my hands were far far away from my crotch and my expressions were too orgasmic. Ignoring her quizzical look, I kept devouring the cake and enjoying the moment I fell in love with the cake. Mentally I promised myself to  bake one hell of a banana cake someday.

A couple of years later arrived the glorious day when the oven came home after a deep discount on Groupon. Excited to recreate the moment I had on the plane, the inaugral bake was the banana cake.

The recipe seemed straight forward

Add butter,sugar and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add eggs and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add banana mash and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add seived flour, baking flour and baking soda and beat.. ensure it is semi fluffy

Add crushed walnuts and beat... nevermind

...Bake

And it was ready. The aroma filled the house letting out all the sirens that the cake was on its way.
It looked pretty good on the outside and the knife sunk in quite well.
As the first piece of the cake landed in my mouth, the aaah banana cake world in my mind just blew up.

It was terrible, terrible, even worse than the potato and tomato omlettes I prepared as a kid and force fed my mother.
Soggy , tasted like batter, bitter and it didn't even have a hint of banana in it. I had managed to even mask the butter and sugar saviour taste most cakes have.

Unable to throw the cake owing to the rich ingredients used, I tried refrigerating it to give it a pudding feel and combined it with ice cream, jam, honey, cream etc
Finally was able to finish it and free up the space in my fridge.

Undeterred by the failure and determined to relish a self baked banana cake, I gave it a try a few months later. A root cause analysis was done and I concluded that barring patience, blender and discipline to follow the recipe, everything else was in order the first time.
So this time the blender had arrived...

Add butter,sugar and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add eggs and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add banana mash and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add seived flour, baking flour and baking soda and beat.. ensure it is semi fluffy

Add crushed walnuts and beat... nevermind

...Bake

What emerged was the same aroma and a dry salty bread.
Root Cause Analysis: too much baking soda, recipe not followed, lack of patience

Hope and craving is a killer combo. They don't let you give up
So like the spider from King Bruce's story I kept attempting again and again and again with different results.

... uncooked cake ..oven wasn't pre-heated
... burnt cake ..too much sugar and too high temperature
... cake that doesn't taste of banana ..bananas were not ripe enough
... wheat flavoured cake .. less eggs were used
... too eggy .. less wheat was used
... tastes like unniappam ..bananas were too ripe,
... tastes too healthy .. less sugar
... too hard
... too soft

and the list went on and on

Practice makes man perfect but in my case creative. Everytime I managed to create a cake with varied taste, look and texture.

A simple 6 step process to a banana cake and yet it turned into my nemesis.

I finally gave in to the universe and moved on to make other cakes. There was even a kiwi cake which tasted like a banana cake but I couldn't get a banana cake made using banana to taste like one.

Like the fox who found his grapes sour, I finally quit stating that the banana cake was too simple and below my baking abilities.

A couple of days back I thought of baking a carrot cake as dessert for some guests. On starting with the ingredients I noticed that there were no carrots at home. Time constraints made me look around for substitutes and unfortunately banana was the only option. It was a serious tussle between baking a horrible cake and leaving the house to get carrots. Laziness won and I chose to risk baking a horrible cake. If things turned out bad, the guests would just have ice cream and listen to the anecdotes of how you to bake a hideous cake.

The drill was the same

Add butter,sugar and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add eggs and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add banana mash and beat.. ensure it is fluffy

Add seived flour, baking flour and baking soda and beat.. ensure it is semi fluffy

Add crushed walnuts and beat... nevermind

...Bake

As always the fragrance was perfect (You can never get a baking smell wrong unless you burn it to charcoal) and so was the structure. 

To spare my guests the trauma of the taste and effort to make up compliments, I had a small piece of the cake to check if it was edible.

I felt my eyelids grow wider and a fresh set of endorphins hit my brain. All I could let out was a sigh.
The taste just exploded in my mouth.

Flavor.. light banana and hint of bitter walnut
Texture.. Moist and firm
Feel.. Like I had just cummed

I was carried back in time to the flight and could actually feel my co-passengers eyes on me while I was letting out the "aaaah".

Unable to believe that the moment had arrived after 6 years and 30+ banana cake bakes, I had another piece to confirm the aura.

The orgasmic "aaaah" was still there. I tried another swivel to re-confirm for the sake of my guests (and my conscience)

.. And another
.. And another
.. And another

The guests finally had just ice cream, listened to anecdotes of how to bake a hideous banana cake and life felt blissful again.

Root cause analysis: Doesn't matter, I finally tamed the beast and tasted the awesomeness!!!